Bootlegging Broadway

The links in this entry lead to a treasure trove of recordings that preserve Broadway performances for posterity. For example, a complete performance of Raisin, the 1973 Tony Award winner for Best Musical, is preserved on an audio recording taped by a member of the audience. How do I know? The person sitting next to the person recording the show had a persistent cough. I was listening to the recording on a particularly long drive and after a half hour I turned to the empty passenger seat in my car and said There's got to be a lozenge or cough syrup. Something..



The downloadable recordings (free via one-click hosting servers like Rapidshare) vary in quality. Some are theatrical soundboard recordings of excellent quality; some (as noted) are listenable with caveats. It is worth searching through the lists if you're a fan of Broadway and musicals.

• Huge Gift Dump
• Off The Market
• share lah~
• Wilkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome! Bootleg
• The Rare Broadway Bootleg Megalist
• Broadway Soundboard Search
• Musical Sharing Goodness
• Broadway (Musicals/Plays) - must register to see links
• Unorganized List
• Carrie and More Fabulous Flops (radio show) and Carrie: The Musical Downloads
• Carrie the Musical
• Viva Les Bootlegs (rock band bootlegs)
  

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Shooting With Pink Pistols

I found a group online called the San Jose Pink Pistols. I know San Jose. I know pink. It was time to know pistols.



San Jose Pink Pistols is a fellowship that welcomes the LGBTQ community and inclusive-straights to meet at the San Jose Municipal Firing Range and bone up on the art of brandishing a weapon. Our Fearless Leader brings a couple of gym bags filled with rifles, handguns and bullets and allows everyone to share.



After hearing some scary shit via an orientation by our Fearless Leader and one of the range's volunteer safety instructors, I put on my eye and ear protection and chose a 9 MM Browning. (Elizabeth Barrett Browning manufactured guns? Who knew?) The Browning had a wood handle and was made for the Belgium army. My Leader walked me through the processes of assembling the handgun then handed me the disparate parts.


Browning Bulls-eye
Red circle first shots; Green circle final shots

I loaded five shells in the magazine (which loads just like a PEZ dispenser), slammed the clip up that mofo, racked the slide ... ready ... aim ... and slowly pulled back on the trigger five times.


Glock Bulls-eye
Red circle first shots; Green circle final shots

I reloaded the Browning and shot it again. I tried a .40-caliber and felt recoil but stood my ground. Next a .38 Special. (I didn't have the nerve to roll the bullet-filled barrel like a cowboy.) Finally, I reached for a .45-caliber Glock pistol. I looked at this movie star gun and knew that - as long as there was nothing IN the gun, I couldn't make a mistake. So I obsessed on making sure I knew how many bullets were in the gun, in the chamber, and how many I had spent AT ALL TIMES. My Leader checked back from time to time (as a responsible Leader would) and I shot a bunch more rounds. Definitely felt the most recoil with the .45-caliber.


Analyze your shoot based on
where the bullet hits the bulls-eye

I was told I had good grouping. According to Wikipedia, accuracy in aim and a steady hand are required to make your shots hit the target very close to each other in a grouping. You need only look at the circles on the bulls-eyes provided to know that this writer is a marksman with good grouping.

And I'm glad for this talent because we gotta keep ourselves armed and ready for the zombie apocalypse.


Shooting stall;
target is about 20 - 30 feet back

• Wash your hands before you leave the range.
• Use both wax earplugs and protective ear phones.
• It is loud.
• Always know how many bullets are in the magazine and the chamber, and how many have been spent.

NOTICE


Shooting stall; second view

Thanks to Will for the pictures
of the San Jose Municipal Firing Range.

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Go For The Gold, Chaz!

I was called out for being condescending. I wasn't though. I was merely correcting some facts a fellow Huffington Post commenter had gotten wrong concerning the career of Ms. Cherilyn Sarkisian Bono Allman - or as she is known on Twitter, Cher. Concurrently, I was pointing out the difference between the words artist, celebrity and star which the commenter was consistently confusing.



The cloud was abuzz with the news that Chaz Bono was a contestant on Dancing With The Stars; pro and con opinions as to whether the poster child for transgenderality (if I might use that word) deserved a place on the competition show were being defined in so many bytes. Cher, Lynnette Southwood opined, is a celebrity. How does that make Chaz one?



According to Merriam-We­bster, celebrity is a noun defined as the state of being celebrated­. Merriam-We­bster then defines celebrated as widely known and often referred to. Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, and the real housewives are celebritie­s - widely known and often referred to. Bristol Palin. like the Teen Moms on MTV, are celebrities. Widely known and often referred to.



Cher is also widely known and often referred to but that is fallout from a career of artistic accomplish­ments spanning 50 years. Cher is an actress and a singer as well as a TV performer. Cher has an Oscar for Moonstruck­. She has many hit records and two television shows under her belt. Cher has acted on Broadway and been directed by Robert Altman. Cher is an artist - whether you like her art or not, Miss HP commenter - and because of that she is a also celebrity. SO far we agree.



Now, a star is a term manufactur­ed in the early days of Hollywood for use by Hollywood. MGM - More Stars Than There Are In Heaven. Today star is synonymous with celebrity. Thus, industry movers and shakers can change the definition of star because they set the bar. And the producers of Dancing With The Stars do just that. The Real housewives of Bravo have never been asked to compete but the aforementioned Palin and Bono have. So Hollywood has expanded the definition of star to include, well, pretty much everybody (except the housewives). Kim and Rob Kardashian, Tom DeLay, Shannen Doherty, Joey Fatone, Drew Lachey, Nancy Grace and Kelly Osbourne are all celebrity stars in this cock-eyed caravan of dance.

As for Cher's son Chaz, he is no different from the others. Chaz is widely known and often referred to - a celebrity. He is a celebrity based on his lineage and activism although he might also be considered an artist, wannabe that is. To recap Chaz's history as an artist he, as Chastity, was in a failed rock band (Ceremony) and wrote a book (which I didn't read). He was the subject of a documentar­y (although the artist in the film's case is the filmmaker, not the subject, who gets the celebrity). Ultimately, Chaz manufactured his celebrity as a way to put a face on transgenderality (if I might use that word again). And he's now a star because of it.



Stardom is always manufactured. Years ago, it was the Hollywood studios who chose someone to whom they would give their backing. Today, it's television producers of shows like Dancing With The Stars and media, like TMZ and the Huffington Post, that chose to whom they give the backing of the star-making machinery.

So, as a star in every 21st century sense of the word, Chaz was chosen for Dancing With The Stars. I applaud the producers. Oodles of publicité. I've never seen the show but I might crank out the 99 cents to vote for Chaz. I still won't watch it but I will try and vote. (Is that how this show works?)

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Lady Caca and Her Poop Purse

It started with a softball game. And of course Lady Gaga. But then doesn't everything start with a softball game and Lady Gaga?



As a volunteer barkeep for the San Jose Gay Pride Festival, I participated in the kick-off event, a game of softball. Considering I hadn't played softball since I was 10, I wasn't quite sure I should; considering that you must dress as a movie star or music star of the opposite gender, I wasn't quite sure I shouldn't. I was told that it would be an expedition game so, after I looked up exhibition game on Wikipedia, I decided to go for it.

WHAT TO WEAR

Yes, I had my old go-to drag but did I really want to be a flat-chested guy in a fifty year old cocktail dress, wearing a moth-eaten mink stole and a ratty wig? Nah.



That night, during a bout of insomnia, I started rhyming words with Lady Gaga. Aga. Baba. CaCa. Dada. Eaea. Fafa. Wait. Caca? (ka.ka) I could be Lady Caca. And carry a Poop Purse.

HOW TO BECOME LADY CACA

1. Buy a bra and girdle combination thing.
   
   I went to Marshall's to buy a bra and panty set. I couldn't figure out how the bra sizes worked so I asked the saleslady. She explained that the size is for the circumference of your back and that if I put the bra on backwards, snapped the catches in front, turned it around, and slipped my arms through the straps I could see if it fit. This worked and I was able to try on a few bras right there in the store!
   
   
   
   Then I found this white bra/girdle combination thing that snapped under the crotch. I had no idea what it is called but I thought it might be more slimming so I asked the saleslady if I could try it on. Please do. she said. My fitting room girl will have something to talk about all day. The bra/girdle combination thing fit as good as I needed although I did buy a pair of white men's briefs; there was no way I was going to snap this contraption and have to run the bases in a softball game with my junk shrunk.
2. Buy poop bags and poop jewelry.
   
   I chose hot pink poop bags to go with my pink-tinged wig. They came with a pink poop bag holder that most would put on their belts or dog's leash. I did put it on my dog's leash but then I put the leash around my neck for a poop necklace. I filled the pink poop necklace with blue poop bags for a pop of color.
3. Make a poop skirt.
   
   
   
   
   Much like Josephine Baker did with bananas, I made a skirt of poop bags. I started with a blue bungee cord that was just the right size - and the pop of color matched the pop of color in the poop necklace. I put safety pins every three inches, down the length of the cord, filled hot pink poop bags with frozen blueberries (that will defrost as the heat of the day wears on) and attached one tied bag to each safety pin.
4. Create a poop purse.
   
   This was easy enough. Fill an extra hot pink poop bag with blueberries and hold it in your hand. A poop purse.
5. Add a pink wig, rose-colored glasses, sneakers to run the bases and voila!
   
   

HOW TO PLAY SOFTBALL DRESSED AS LADY CACA

I went to Savers, our local thrift store, and found two mitts: one for a child, the other a bit bigger. The big question I had was why were both for the left hand? I mean what are the odds that the two baseball gloves in a thrift store would BOTH be for the left hand? I figured what the hell; I hadn't played since I was 10 years old anyway and I am an ambidextrous mouser so I bought the bigger one.



When I got to the game, I told the coach about my skill level. She brought me out in the field for practice. As we walked, I told her about the left-handed glove. Well, she said. Most gloves are left-handed because most people throw with their right hand. Ohhhhhhhhh, now I get it. Surprisingly enough, I managed to catch every ball she lobbed in my direction.



I came up to bat before I even went into the outfield. My first time at bat (and much like Lady Gaga did with Cher at the MTV Video Music Awards) I asked the umpire if he might hold my poop purse. He graciously did. Or was it she?

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Lucy and the Retro Lawnchair

I bought a fabulous retro lawn chair at a garage sale, schlepped it home, dragged it out of the car, set it up in the backyard, went inside to make a mint julep and came back out to find - I still had to use the rickety old wood bench.

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Why I Covered Lady Gaga's Hair (With A Heart On)

After ten years of partnership, George and I separated. George went to Missoula, Montana to attend university and I went on my first visit to a bar in (way over) ten years. I walked in and almost immediately the thoughts of an under-confident and physically insecure youngster came surfing back into my mind.

I'm not like these guys.
I'm unapproachable.
I'm not cute.
I'm too old.
I've got a gut.
My body is too hairy.
I'm a freak.

Holy shit! Who can weather that type of bullying? Without even ordering a drink I left the bar a shattered man.



This happened the same week that Lady Gaga's record Born This Way was released so, of course, I was listening to it on the way home. As track six was playing I came to a more personal understanding of the lyrics; it was my Gaga could've had a V8 moment.

In that moment of understanding, I decided to help this under-confident and physically insecure youngster inside me to embrace his perceived faults and realize that his differences are what make him special. The best way to do this, I surmised, was to cover track six, Hair, in a very public forum - with all these perceived faults on display. To make the video accessible in the public forum, I put a heart on.



THANKS TO:

• JesseLCue for the Hair backing track.
• Max, my Jack Russell Terrier, for making four unannounced yet pivotal appearances.
• My Vietnamese lady barber who collected the hair she cut off my head the morning I filmed the video so I could throw it to the wind.
• Mother Monster - for your inspiration, your honesty and your temerity. There are still many people (young and less young) who need to stand up and say to the naysayers (including those in our own minds), I was Born This Way, baby...and through your work, they are (and I am still) learning how.

UPDATE Fall 2012: I've lost almost 30 pounds since the filming of that video and look and feel great. What do you think of my Prince Harry salute?

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[title of show] @ Mountain View Center for Performing Arts

Watching [title of show], the musical by two guys about two guys writing a musical, can be compared to looking at reflections in a hall of mirrors. Because a hall of mirrors also contains panes of glass, you never know if you are seeing something that is real or something that is a reflection. This concept of reality versus reflection initially confuses the storyline but, as the 90 minute show (with no intermission) moves along, meatier themes and more memorable songs are introduced that ultimately make for a sweet but mostly benign evening.



The Mountain View Center for Performing Arts (MVCFPA) production opened on June 1, 2011, following (by years) its premiere at the New York Musical Theatre Festival in 2004, and subsequent runs off-Broadway and on. It is this journey that is performed by a first rate cast including New York based actors Jamison Stern, Laura Jordan and Farah Alvin and the Bay Area's Ian Leonard. The ladies, Jordan and Alvin, come off best - probably because there characters are written with more depth and they have the most memorable songs. What Kind Of Girl Is She? is a wonderfully funny duet placed in the middle of the show which on reflection (yea, pun intended) seems the turning point to real. Jordan's Die Vampire, Die!, even with its somewhat forced lyrical metaphors, is a clever number, universal in its theme of defeating the doubts in our own heads. Alvin's solo A Way Back To Then is a triumph of simplicity and power, arguably the best song in the show.



Stern and Leonard are good enough despite their characters seeming as cartoons rather then flesh and blood. They also get saddled with inferior songs like Untitled Opening Number, Two Nobodies In New York and An Original Musical - unfortunately, the first three songs in the show. All four actors perform the nicely staged Monkeys and Playbills (with its roll out of classic Playbill covers), the rhythmic Change It, Don't Change It/Awkward Photo Shoot, and Nine People's Favorite Things, the final song that closes out the evening on a high note. Also, worth his weight in gold is William Lieberatore, MVCFPA's Musical Director, who accompanies the cast on stage and actually has a few small yet pivotal lines!



The set, with its backdrop of brick and plaster emulating a New York studio apartment, is bare bones and fits the scenario. Each character is given their own chair (shades of Miss Marmelstein in I Can Get It For You Wholesale?) and most of the numbers are staged using them. (I thought seeing Jordan's character, the only one with a full time job, rolling around in her $800 Herman Miller desk chair a nice touch.) Director Meredith McDonough has managed to create the whole of New York in this small apartment.

[title of show] is not a musical in the grand Broadway tradition. It does not use a full orchestra, there is no dancing and it has references that only theatre queens would recognize (the program includes a glossary for the uninformed). And, as directly quoted from the script, it often seems like obvious pandering and too self-indulgent. Still though composer Jeff Bowen and writer Hunter Bell have managed to do something that many other artists have not - get their work seen; that, in itself, makes [title of show] a triumph.

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Sharing Out-of-Print Content Using BitTorrent

This article assumes anyone following this procedure is sharing ONLY out-of-print content that can NOT be bought in your local mom-and-pop retail store or online vendor. Neither the article nor its writer advocates the downloading of copyrighted, in print media of any type because, simply, it is illegal and you can go to jail.

There's been a lot of outcry regarding the sharing community. It's illegal. Corporations are losing money. Artists aren't paid for their work. Now all may be true in regards to downloading current, in print works of art (term used loosely) but there is a side to the community that isn't often referred to: the side that shares older, out-of-print works of art to keep them alive. How many films have been made that are not available on DVD? How many vinyl records have never been digitized? How many books can no longer be found in vanishing libraries and book stores? Were it not for the sharing community, these works of art might become as extinct as the dodo bird.

Towards this end, I have been asked recently by a number of friends how to get some of these rare, out-of-print items. After spending two hours explaining how to use BitTorrent trackers to one friend, I decided to write this simple guide for the others - and anyone else that might be interested. This article contains the following sections.

• What is BitTorrent?
• The BitTorrent Sharing Procedure
• Seeding and Leeching and Ratios, Oh My
• Sharing Speeds
• The End

What is BitTorrent?

BitTorrent Tracker Networks are peer-to-peer (computers like yours connected to computers like mine) networks that use the BitTorrent protocol to connect. In a nutshell, when you decide on content you want to share, you search for a small text file associated with the share called a torrent. A torrent file has the .torrent extension and allows for sharing, and tracking the multiple (and worldwide) locations of the specific content.

Because of its tracking feature, I will use the term tracker in this article (rather than torrent) to differentiate this small text file from any other uses of the word torrent.

When (and if) you find a tracker for content that is out-of-print, you open it in a BitTorrent application which then finds other computers (peers) that have this particular content, connects to them, and begins to share. The tracker essentially creates a network of personal computers solely dedicated to sharing this specific content. The BitTorrent Sharing Procedure delves into the details.

The BitTorrent Sharing Procedure

1. Download and install a BitTorrent application.
   
   On the Mac, this application might be Transmission; on Windows, it might be uTorrent. There are many other BitTorrent applications and you may not find one you like until you've downloaded it, installed it and used it. I happened on Transmission after first trying something called Tomato Torrent. I will be using screen shots from Transmission. You can right-click on any of these screen shots to view the larger image.
2. Ensure that the peer listening port set in your BitTorrent application preferences (or options) is open in your home network.
   
   
   
   I can't help with this as I don't know your internet service provider (ISP) or how your home network is configured or which application you have installed. You might not need to do anything. After installing the BitTorrent application, you can start sharing and see how fast the bits are transferred. If you want to investigate this step, try an internet search using terms that map to open port ISP application. For example, I searched open port uVerse transmission. Tweak the search terms based on your choices or add torrent or listening port to them and see what results are returned. It took a bit of work to find information on how to open my port but don't be discouraged - it's out there somewhere.
3. Create a directory on your computer called Torrents.
   
   This is the directory in which you should put your downloaded trackers - assuming they are downloaded to a Downloads directory configured in your browser's settings.
4. Set this Torrents directory in your BitTorrent application.
   
   
   
   I have set Transmission to download files into the same directory from which I will open the tracker. With this option, it does not require a specific directory but it does require that I (being the organized person that I am) move all my trackers into this one directory. I don't advise using more than one directory because you are allowing external access to whatever directory is defined. I'd rather my BitTorrent application only know about the one directory.
5. Download a tracker and move it into your Torrents directory.
   
   This should take no time because the tracker, as mentioned, is just a small text file. Here is a link to a tracker page on btjunkie for Second Serve, a television film starring Vanessa Redgrave that was only released on Video Home System (yep, it's an acronym: VHS) tape in the United Kingdom.
   
   
   
   Be careful that you are clicking the correct download link. Tracker search engines make their money when people click on the ads not when they download a tracker. Even an inadvertent click is money so, of course, the tracker download button is usually the smallest on the page. Read everything before you click. In this screen shot, you can see the word DOWNLOAD four times. I use the first Download Torrent with the green icon next to it. Be sure to read everything and choose carefully before you click.
   
   

   NOTE: This screen shot I used is benign but be aware that many tracker search engines have pornographic advertisers with pee-pees and (mostly) va-jay-jays screaming hello. My suggestion is NOT to follow this procedure on a work computer or in a room where your mother might be sitting.

   
   Also, be aware that different tracker search engines might have different trackers for the same file or different trackers associated with different files for the same content. It is all dependent upon which search engine the person who is sharing the file has decided to use to disseminate the tracker.
6. Start your BitTorrent application and open the tracker file from within it.
   
   
   
   In this screen shot, File -> Open Torrent File opens a dialog box from which you will search for your Torrents directory, select the tracker you downloaded (and moved to the directory) and click Open. Note the Second Serve tracker name selected in the screen shot - including the year, movie name, additional text and the .torrent extension - is somewhat atypical for a tracker name; often you might just see the name with (seemingly) random numbers and letters and the .torrent extension. An Add dialog will pop-up and display the name of the file being shared.
7. Click Add to begin sharing this tracker.
   
   
   
   A dialogue is displayed in which we are finally seeing the actual name of the files: Second Serve.avi and a small text file inside a folder named Second Serve will be shared.
   
   

   Sometimes the file being shared will be a sole AVI file or content compressed into a ZIP or .rar archive. In the case of compressed files, you will need the proper software to decompress them.

   
   Once added to the queue, the interface for your application might look something like this:
   
   
   
   The slim blue line confirms that sharing has begun. You see other terms like All, Active, Downloading, Seeding, and Paused. These terms allow you to customize what you see. Do you want to see all trackers you have added whether they are currently being shared or not? Or do you want to see only those that are still in the queue but might be paused for one reason or another? Also note the terms Ratio and Seeding; these are very important terms which I will explain in a moment.
   
   As sharing continues, I opened the information panel (on your left) so you can see from which IP addresses (with last numbers removed) this file is being shared. The BitTorrent application being used is also listed. Note the blue line on the right has gotten longer as sharing continues. (You can follow progress with the Time Remaining and % properties above the blue line as well.)
   
   
   
   As sharing continues to continue, I opened the activity panel (on your left) so you can see how much of the file has already been shared. You see Downloaded, Uploaded and Ratio (again). Definitions coming up.
   
   
   
   When the file is complete, this same Downloading screen will be empty but when you click the Seeding link and the Seeding screen is displayed, you see that the line is green and other computers are still sharing from your directory. You will soon be able to close the tracker file from within the BitTorrent application. See Seeding and Leeching and Ratios, Oh My for information on when this should happen.
   
   

Seeding and Leeching and Ratios, Oh My

More important than this procedure is the sharing community itself and how your actions relate to it. Let's first define two terms you need to know.

• A seeder is a computer that contains the file you want. The seeder may have 100% of the file or 1% of the file; the percentage of the file on the computer does not matter because someone somewhere will be able to share whatever portion is present. When you open a tracker in your BitTorrent application and you have some (or all) bits from the associated file, you are seeding. You will always be considered a seeder until you close the tracker file and are no longer tracked as part of the network for that specific file.
• A leecher is a computer that wants the file you have. The leecher may have 99% of the file or 0% of the file. When you open a tracker in your BitTorrent application to share a file, you are a leecher UNTIL you have completely downloaded 100% of the file. Once you have obtained 100% of the file, you are no longer leeching. But you may not be ready to close the tracker file yet.

The concepts that keep the community alive are generosity and fair sharing. People who digitize out-of-print content and begin to seed it by creating a tracker are generously donating their time and bandwidth so others may enjoy. There is an expectation among those who create content that those who leech content will also donate their time and bandwidth so others may enjoy. That's where your personal ratio comes into play. It is expected, as a model member of the sharing community, that you will give, at the very least, what you take.

For example, Second Serve is a 789 MB file so when you complete your leech you have downloaded 789 MB. It is expected that over time you will keep that tracker alive until you have seeded to others a minimum of 789 MB. This would give you a personal ratio of 1:1 for the Second Serve tracker. Thus, as you can enjoy this content others who have leeched from you may enjoy it as well. These leechers will, in turn, seed to others and so on and so on and so on. Now you can imagine what would happen if everyone who leeched immediately removed the Second Serve tracker and did not seed - the tracker will die and with it the ability for others to see this out-of-print content.

When you open a tracker and begin to leech a file, you almost immediately become a seeder as well. (Remember a seeder may have 1% or 100% of a file.) You will continue to seed as long as the tracker is active in your BitTorrent application. You can seed at the same time as you leech but, most probably, the bulk of your seeding will occur AFTER you have downloaded 100% of your file and have stopped leeching. That's because we are discussing files that not many people want or are even aware exists. I would venture a guess that 99% of those who are reading this article have never even heard of the movie Second Serve, the true story of a transgender tennis player.

It is expected that you will continue to seed until you have reached a positive upload:download ratio. 1:1 (as in our example) is the minimum positive ratio. The higher the ratio, the more you have contributed. If you have a good ratio, you will be more appreciated by the torrent community. When I learned about the community, I decided to keep my personal ratio at (a minimum of) 2:1. This means that three people will enjoy this content because of me: first (and certainly foremost) myself and then the two others alluded to by my upload number.

NOTE: Seeding and the ratio number are not as cut and dried as the previous sentence leads you to believe. Your BitTorrent application keeps track of your seeding total and ratio. Somewhere in your application's window you will see this ratio; in the Transmission screen shots it is in the top left corner. Thus you can technically be seeding to eight people but all is good as long as you keep a positive ratio.

If you have a personal ratio below 1:1 (meaning you leech 789 MB but only seed 100 MB) you are JUST leeching and not interested in helping others complete their download. In this case, you are cheating the community and we don't like leechers. A positive personal ratio indicates that you have sent more data to other users than you have received. People like seeders so please seed at least as much as you leech for each specific tracker. If you have a negative ratio there are other consequences (besides karmic) as discussed in Sharing Speeds.

Sharing Speeds

The speed of your share is dependent on a number of things.

1. Your personal ratio (see!)
2. Seeders THAT ARE ONLINE
3. Settings you have chosen for your BitTorrent application
4. Settings others have chosen for their BitTorrent application
5. Your personal network speed

#1 - Trackers keep track of your personal ratio as well as your BitTorrent application and will denigrate speed based on it. You want to download faster? Pump up your ratio. There are many seeders who keep to 4:1 or even 10:1 ratios. Even after completing a share with a personal ratio of (minimum) 2:1, I generally keep the tracker file and will open the tracker file to re-seed if I notice via comments in the tracker search engines that leechers are stalled at a certain percentage. It's karma, baby.

#2 - Now why did I capitalize THAT ARE ONLINE? Because many people shut down their computers when they are finished using it for the day. (I know I do.) So even though a tracker might know about a computer seeder, the owner might have shut the computer down for the evening. When that happens, the file ON THAT COMPUTER will only be available again when the owner turns the computer back on and starts their BitTorrent application. Because many out-of-print files might only have two or three seeders, the leech will undoubtedly take some time before the complete file has been downloaded to your computer. As you seed and turn your own computer off and back on, the leechers will find you again and the downloads can continue. This is expected by members of the community.

#3 - BitTorrent applications have options that you can set to limit downloads and uploads to specific numbers in KBs. These are your decisions to make. They are modified per specific tracker and I find I often change these options depending on how much desire I have to see something NOW.

#4 - Just as you can set download and upload limits so can everyone else.

#5 - This is a no-brainer - you can't get speeds faster than your ISP allows.

The End

Well, it's the end of this article anyway. There are more aspects of sharing out-of-print content using the BitTorrent protocol than I have documented but this should get you started. If you are interested in delving more deeply into other details, you can start with the BitTorrent entry at Wikipedia.

Now if you'll excuse me I am going to watch Second Serve and maybe after that I'll watch Isadora, both starring Vanessa Redgrave and both, at the time of this writing, hopelessly out-of-print.

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Tin Roof Rusted - Or Snow in San Jose

I was awoken at 1 AM by a loud, continuous, rat-tat-a-tat-tat. I knew it had something to do with the tin roof that covers the backyard patio. And for sure it was raining tapioca-sized hail.



With all the animals shivering around, we fell back asleep. When we awoke later that morning, there was snow on the grass and on the roof of the house. In San Jose, California. In mid-April.



It might not be a lot but my neighbor had a snowball he was saving! And it's something I've never experienced.



I hope my potato bush is okay.

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Gaga Goes To Google And To Oakland

This hour long interview (conducted as a Google all-hands) reveals Lady Gaga to be an articulate­, intelligen­t, charmingly sweet and positively determined musician. She was asked all types of questions via YouTube, the interviewe­r and the audience, and answered each one with honesty and humor. I appreciate­d her discussed artistry, her waxing philosophical, and her recognition of her fans. And damn, those boots!



And damn, the Monster Ball at the Oracle Arena in Oakland! But unlike last year's ball, this time I just watched, sang and danced. The only numbers I hadn't seen were Gaga's two renditions of Born This Way: one jazz-like at her piano and the other, a club banger to end the show. It was incredible to watch us, her fans, giving as good as they got at the show's end.

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Trim My Bush, Tabatha?

Tabatha Coffey is tough, talented and taking over. A niche Suze Orman, Coffey is a no nonsense business woman (and studied stylist) who turns a tanking hair salon into a money machine in one week on her television show, Tabatha's Salon Takeover. A loyal fan, she also turned me into a stylist for my garden when it came to evaluating and trimming my overgrown blue potato bush.



THE CONSULTATION

What would you like to do with it, Michael?

I'd like to take off a good deal of length.

Has it ever been short before?

I imagine it would be healthy, low maintenance and majestic, like yours.

Yes, that it would.



THE CUT

I started with a blunt cut that became a guide for the trim. Then I sectioned it off and used bevel cuts for each part. (It was hard to keep the trimmer at 90 degrees.) I undercut the top so I could get to them with more ease. I wanted the very top to fall in layers. Once I got the graduated shape the way I wanted, I texturized the outer layer to add a studied naturalism and a subtle elegance. Voila!



THE ASSESSMENT

Michael wanted to be able to walk under his blue potato bush (which blooms flowers that are closer to purple but that's a digression). Michael wanted a blue potato tree that did not dwarf the California Redwood he has cared for since four inches tall. Now his blue potato tree is tall and majestic but not overpowering. If Michael keeps up with the low, monthly maintenance, he will have a lovely and healthy tree to add to the natural feel in his backyard for years to come.


Phenomenal Tabatha Doll ©minieyap
Click this text for more photos and details

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Jean Arthur Is More Than A Secretary

When I leave (the animals) Max and Lucy alone in the house I put the television on Turner Classic Movies for their company. When I return, if I see something worth viewing, I live rewind and enjoy it myself. And walking in to see the luminous Jean Arthur, an actor noted for playing tough, independent, and vulnerable middle-class working girls, is always a good reason to live rewind.



Jean Arthur's most infamous asset (notwithstanding her skill as a comedienne) was her voice - a mash-up that blends the husky tones of Beatrice Arthur with the high-pitched squeaks of Butterfly McQueen (I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' babies!.). More Than A Secretary, the rewound film, takes place in the publishing offices of a health food magazine - a business setting not often seen in black and white comedies. So I spread my almond butter and conserves on rice cakes, poured a cup of sinfully delicious rice milk and lost myself in the antics of 1936.



Arthur (a stenog herself during World War I) owns a secretarial school and is tired of her (female) graduates applying for the job but, in the end, getting the boss. She then receives a phone call from the editor of a health food magazine who has fired one of her students for being a poor worker. Her reputation impugned, Arthur goes down to the office, is mistaken for a job applicant, takes the secretarial job AND a shine to her new boss. Instead of reciprocating personally, George Brent promotes Arthur to associate editor, and takes a shine to Maizie, a non matriculated blonde floozy student who takes the boss for all she can.



The interesting things in More Than A Secretary are the comparisons between yesterday and today. At one point, Arthur tries to convince Brent that a female model on the cover of the health magazine (rather than a male bodybuilder) is good marketing and not prurient. 'Blackface comics sell toothpaste,' she says as an example of good marketing. And almost fifty years before he hit supporting actor pay dirt as the old guy on the 1980s television hit Hart To Hart, Lionel Stander played the magazine's male bodybuilder model whose face is replaced in each of his pictures with that of a prettier man. The star crossed lovers even have dinner in The Eat Right, a vegetarian restaurant in which Arthur chows down on Pro-Toze, a steak made from vegetables and mashed nuts, only to spit the vegan meat into her napkin. Finally - SPOILER ALERT - Arthur sells her school and goes on the road with her girlfriend, in a car towing a camper.



Maizie, played by Dorothea Kent, is an offbeat character. In telling Brent how the older Arthur treated her at school, "More like a mother than a daughter." In fact, Maizie's role is of a secretary paramour; she is used, paid nicely and passed on by every boss in the movie. (The look on Brent's face as he tries to palm Maizie off on the next boss is priceless.) One of the more memorable scenes is when Arthur puts Maizie over her knee and gives her a good spanking.



More Than A Secretary is more than a movie; it's a bit of history not often seen (it's not on DVD) or documented. And it's Jean Arthur. And it's healthy. And I just happened to catch it on a live rewind. Thanks Max and Lucy.

2013 Update: Watch the movie on YouTube - not sure for how long though.

See my Pinterest page for a slew of pictures of Jean from throughout her life and career.

These Jean Arthur movies can be seen on archive.org.

• The Card Sharks 1930 starring William Powell, Kay Francis, Jean Arthur, Regis Toomey
• Resurrected 1930 starring Warner Oland, O. P. Heggie, Jean Arthur, Neil Hamilton 1930
• The House Of Fear starring William Powell, Florence Eldridge, Jean Arthur, Eugene Pallette 1929
• Here Comes The Bandwagon starring Charles Buddy Rogers, Jean Arthur, Paul Lukas, Helen Ware 1929
• The Red Dragon starring Warner Oland, Neil Hamilton, Jean Arthur, O. P. Heggie 1929
• Love 'Em And Leave 'Em starring Clara Bow, James Hall, Edna May Oliver, Jean Arthur 1929

This video is a promo for the short-lived 1967 situation comedy The Jean Arthur Show.

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No Applause for Lauren Bacall

For many years I have wondered about Applause, the late 1960s musical sourced from the classic film All About Eve. Listening to the Broadway cast recording is a mundane experience at best. The lyrics are simplistic and the melodies non-existent. My guess is that for a rasping vocalist like Lauren Bacall a melody would just get in the way.

The title tune is the most memorable song on the record but it's sung by Bonnie Franklin, not star Bacall. Fasten Your Seat Belts (alluding to the film's most quotable quote) is the horrifying first act closer with vocal "honks," if you will. And Bacall's plaintive ballad Hurry Back pains MY throat when I hear it. Bacall might have been good as Margo Channing (the grande dame of the theater famously played by Bette Davis on celluloid) but the cast recording does not give one much reason to hope.

So it was with trepidation that I watched the 1973 television adaptation of Applause. This special aired once on CBS, never to be seen again - and now I know why. It is not pretty. But for a television broadcast it was groundbreaking:

• It portrays older woman Bacall in a relationship with younger man Larry Hagman. Hagman lip syncs to some vocal and does a little dance. His mother, after all, is...
• The first big musical number But Alive is at a bar in Greenwich Village that only has male customers and where Bacall does her best dancing.
• Ms. Channing and Eve are taken to said bar by Dwayne, Ms. Channing's openly homosexual assistant.

We get progressively cattier as the items continue.

• According to the television title cards, there are six acts in this musical. SIX!
• Fasten Your Seat Belts is still a horrifying number with vocal "honks," if you will, but with six acts it was no longer the first act closer.
• Eve Harrington (you all know all about Eve) is portrayed devilishly by Penny Fuller who, with Bacall, originated the part on Broadway. Her big number One Hallowe'en is good despite the fact that it is just the opening number But Alive with some extra lines about her dad and Halloween. I don't even know why they had to use the apostrophe in Halloween.
• Bonnie Franklin is NOT the Broadway dancer (or gypsy) who sings the title song Applause in the special although she was the gypsy who sang the song on Broadway. The girl who sings it on television was never heard from again and Bonnie Franklin went onto great success as the star of CBS' own situation comedy, One Day At A Time.
• The movie is so much better.
  
  
• This retelling of Eve's story paints her as a literal whore - thanks to the permissive 1970s television standards.
• In one scene, Ms. Bacall as Ms. Channing is having pictures taken for a coffee advertisement; Ms. Bacall was famously paid (in the 1970s) for her High Point Decaffeinated Coffee television commercials.
• They dropped a bunch of songs but not the sappy, lesbianic anthem The Best Night Of My Life.
• Ms. Bacall's solo performance of Something Greater is one for the annals of histrionics.
• Why wasn't Margo Channing (the character in the musical) made a musical comedy star rather than a dramatic actress? She speaks throughout Applause of the play she is in, the writer's new play, the play in which Eve wants the part, the play, the play, the play. Then why bring gypsies into it for one scene? Gypsies are in musicals.
• The show ends with a very surrealistic curtain call.

Well, this 1973 television production does not give one much reason to hope that the Broadway production was any better. To be fair, Ms. Bacall was the least of this shows problems which began with Betty Comden, Adolph Green (I know!), Charles Strouse and Lee Adams (I know.)

But you can watch this television version of Applause right now and see for yourself. MikeyG0901 has edited the recording into ten minute clips. The first one is below. Just click through to the YouTube page and follow the part numbers.

Or email me for a download URL to an WMV file that contains the complete almost two hour special.

Here's the original review of the theatrical production reproduced from the New York Times. Clive Barnes loved it. Maybe it loses something on the small screen - or maybe he's tone deaf.

Right click to enlarge

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